Watching the Maloof Money Cup makes me miss the way things were. Such an insane amount of nostalgia going on right now.

I really wish I could make sense of my own words. Feelings come and go and make me feel crazy.

I currently feel like I'm absolutely failing at being a decent person. I've broken Adam's heart, what's next?

Life will go on.

I realize that I'm really not good at being alone.

I'm not ready to settle down. I want to explore the world and I was to explore people.
I'm not ready for this, I'm not ready for this, I'm not ready for this.

Something bad is about to happen. My once so solid life isn't so solid anymore. Yikes, emotions got ahold of me.

Not too many people get a chance to see a connection between two people based not on sexuality, but something real. That's how you make me feel. We formed a bond and I could go on forever telling the world how together we're two of a kind - body soul and mind.

This rain is wonderful, it brings Adam down, but it brings me up! I can only hope that me being up, will help Adam not be down. This winter should be full of joy. 30 days til the moment of truth.

Feelin lazy lately. Wish I had more things to do. About a week from now I won't be wishing that though. School starts on Monday and I'm going to be busier that heck. It'll be awesome though.

I love school. I'm taking psychology and my professor is smarter than any professor I've ever had. We have to keep a dream journal which I'm pretty excited about. I've always wanted to, but I've never really been pushed to do it, so now that it is an assignment, it'll actually get done! I'm excited to see how it turns out. I had a dream the other night that I was at an aquarium and the giant whale swam from the bottom of the aquarium to the top and stuck out his HUGE tongue and licked it the entire way up. It was awesome! That's all the entire dream way about, and I think that's awesome. Why on earth would my mind make me dream something like that? Needless to say, I will be recording some of my random dreams here so get ready for craziness.

p.s. Regina Spektor never fails to amaze me.

I seriously really enjoy the 500 Days Of Summer soundtrack!

The last few days I was having some crazy convulsions. Not physically, but emotionally if possible. But I have finally evened out and am feeling like my feet are back on the ground, partially anyways. Tomorrow is Adam and I's ten months together date or whatever. Feels like a lot longer than that. Can't wait to ten years.

Hey Glaucoma, leave me alone. I'm tired of dealing with the headaches you give me and taking your stupid tests.

I've recently developed a liking for (partly)nude modeling/modeling.

welcome to the terrordome.

Started up on my regular yoga routine again. Feeling sore, but better. I'm determined to get into shape again. I hate going to the park with Adam and getting tired from running and playing frisbee. When did I let myself goooooo?! I wanna get fit son!

Paramore rules.

Adam's dad got into yet another biking accident today. Some guy ran him off the road breaking his wrist and finger I think? Anyways, then once his mom got to the hospital their brand new truck broke down. Ha, what a horrible day.

I need to fin a new yoga center and some good books to read. School officially ends tomorrow until September 21 which means I will have just a little bit of time to relaxxxxx.

How many hours will I sit in a bank and on the telephone with automated assholes? What has brought me to this? Someone else's idiocy.

On the flip side, my USB that holds all of the information for my summer USB sociology class no longer works, so I will be taking the last 200 question exam sometime before thursday without any study material. Shit man.

I got a twitter today. Who knows why, I guess curiosity. It's under Shelby Johnson if you wanna be my twitter friend or my follower or whatever it's called!

Identity theft? Not any fun, and I'm the victim.

Listening to Sunday with The Beatles. Adam is in the front room reading National Geographic, but he doesn't like to share so I'm in the living room laying on the couch. Today is my mom's birthday. She's in Oregon shopping and stuff with her boyfriend and will be back later tonight. I'm going to make her a cake while she's gone and clean the house. Anyways, back to my couch.

Trying to figure out how to balance things in life is hard. I can't afford to have JUST the job at the Child Care Center so I have to keep working at the Beanery... ugh. I'm definitely over that job. Anyways, the maximum number of hours I can get at the center is 10/week according to financial aid because I'm working through work study.

So 10 hrs/week at the center which would be like 2 or 3 days split up then probably 3 days/week at the Beanery which leaves me with still not that many hours and only one day open for Adam time, family time, school stuff, and play. Sighhhh.

Not to mention I'm taking 18 credits.